Today is supposed to be the 16K mark for #NaNoWriMo if you’re on target.  I’m sitting at 4K – and honestly half of that is outline that is going to go away when I actually start writing.  Considering that I pumped out Abandon in a little under a month, I’m frustrated by the lack of my writing as of late.  I have the outline there, I have the story, I just need to flesh it out – should be easy.  Instead, I sit here staring at at my computer for hours, writing and rewriting the same paragraph twenty times over.

In fact, the only time that I actually got any significant amount of writing done at all was when Amr was over on Monday night.   And even that was only somewhere around 1,000 words.  (If that.)

In short, I’m totally failing at #NaNoWriMo.

There are two major reasons for this:

1.  I’m depressed.  I’ve talked about it before, but there’s something inherently depressing about my life as of late.  While some people take depression and channel that into writing, my version of being depressed is just sitting and staring blankly at the screen.  I can’t find the motivation to write at all.  (In fact, this blog post is taking some serious effort to put together and I’m only doing it because of National Blog Posting Month.

2.  My parents are retiring, which means I’m getting a ton of their shit.  As such, I’ve been rearranging my house every weekend, and going over to their house picking out what I want.  It’s pretty intense.  30 years in a house, all in a couple of boxes.  In addition, I’m trying to get as much time as possible with my parents before they leave.  Or really, in that house.

According to the website, I need to write 2,000 words a day to finish on time.

I’m so screwed.